


Final Fantasy & Me

by CreepypastaHound



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Chibi robo, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Headcanon Accepted, Interactive Fiction, Reader-Interactive, Square Enix - Freeform, World of Final Fantasy sort of, all Final fantasy characters, chibi final fantasy, pet robot, silliness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-22
Updated: 2017-05-15
Packaged: 2018-09-26 10:00:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9885074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CreepypastaHound/pseuds/CreepypastaHound
Summary: You have been given an invitation to adopt a living robot version of your favorite characters. The story is an interactive one so if you have questions or complaints about your robot leave a comment and they will be answered, by professionals who had raised the character you have been given.(HeadCanons are very welcome, and other Final Fantasy characters are welcome not just Final Fantasy XV, Kingdom Hearts is welcome as well since some characters are mentioned)





	1. Welcome Video

_Video player is opening..._

_Reading disc..._

_Loading video..._

_Loading..._

_Loading..._

_Loading..._

_Man in lab coat_ : Hello, if you're seeing this then that means you have been invited to take part in something that only employees of S2E get to take part in. I'm Dr. Bildumup and I have the honor of welcoming you to Square² Enix, the sister company to the beloved Square Enix. Now unlike Square Enix, we do not produce videogames, we do however create something just as good if not better.

 _The Doctor:_ You see, what we work on here is making your dreams a reality. Kind of like the slogan of our most recent game...well not ours but Squares', you know...anyway. Have you ever seen a character and said 'Man I wish they were real'? I know I have, I used to be way into Lord of The Rings and I wished I could just have a little Smaug in my house.

 _The Doctor:_ Well if you're like me then look no further than this video, keep watching and I will show you how you can get your hands on one of our special offers. _(The man walks behind the metal table standing next to the whiteboard next to the table)_ Now you're probably thinking that this all too good to be true but it's not. You see I'm a engineer and I have spent years looking into special mechanics and mechanisms just for this special job. But after years of trial and error I have finally created living breathing robots but their small.

 _The Doctor:_ Now I am offering you the chance to get one of my many robots, from the latest installment of Final Fantasy. They will look like this _(the doctorwhistles and a familiar voice says No in the background making the doctor asks again and a harsh response is heard)_ this is...oh um...give me a second. C.L.O.U.D c'mon now...please...C.L.O.U.D please...thank you.

 _(A small chibi version of Cloud Strife hops onto the table glaring)_ This is as you all know C.L.O.U.D from FFVII, he has also stared in many other games and some movies. Now as you see here _(the doctor tries to point to something on C.L.O.U.D causing him to step to the side)_ as you can see we based his appearance off of World of Final Fantasy, and _(C.L.O.U.D crosses his arms wandering around the table commenting on the video)_ he has his own personality...I was trying to show you that he has all the details that his videogame counterpart does. Down to every last detail. _(The doctor makes a move for C.L.O.U.D'S Buster Sword, who leaps back glaring up at him)_ His sword is made of real metal which does cut, I had cut my hand many times.

 _The Doctor:_ These little guys have the capability of growing attached to you the more you interact with them _(the doctor makes a move for C.L.O.U.D once more who draws his sword at him)_ clearly I haven't been doing a great job...I must warn you that they do need to eat, sleep, will use the bathroom, and must get plenty of exercise. You don't know how many times I get complaints from folks who order these guys because they didn't realize they needed to care them.

Like all living things your companion will develop fears and dislikes _(the doctor holds up a broccoli and Cloud makes a disgusted face)_ , they will develop fascination and love for many things _(the doctor holds up a fruit and C.L.O.U.D looks at it asking for the fruit which the doctor gives him which C.L.O.U.D begins to eat)_ so be sure not to hurt or harm them you don't know how heartbreaking it is to see your favorite characters flinch and hide from you.

 _The Doctor:_ Okay on a lighter note, I'm positive you would like to your own character. This time we're issuing out Final Fantasy XV characters, all in the same World of Final Fantasy style. Each are no bigger than a football standing on its tip, however some are smaller depending on their videogame counterparts height. So we hope you have a favorite in mind based off the E3 footage, movie, anime, or gameplay you seen.

We have three options to choose from when it comes to picking who you want.

We have **Random:** As the name suggests we will randomly choose a character from our list and ship them to you. _(An animation plays out of a box with a question mark is shipped via truck and plane and truck again before arriving to a house)_

 **Match Me** : Here you take a quiz, and the quiz will tell you who is best for you. _(Show an animation of a person taking a quiz before their face and a image of Cid is put together with a heart)_

 **Lemme Call the Shots:** You tell us who you want. ( _An animation shows a crowd with speech bubbles over their heads with various characters in them)_

 _The Doctor:_ Once you have been set up with your character we'll begin the shipping process. We take great care in shipping our characters so no need for panic. The best part is there is no shipping or handling fee. You will receive along with the characters a starter kit which in including extra clothes, a small instruction manual, a blanket and pillow, a small supply of potions, and a Phoenix Down. _(C.L.O.U.D can be seen staring intensely at the Phoenix Down)_

Now the manual will tell you how to start up your new friend, every last one of them requires a different start up and each has their own required amount of boot up time. Now the manual will also come with a small booklet created by me, and fellow workers who had cared for our own Final Fantasy characters, which will explain what to expect out of them.

_(C.L.O.U.D faces the left end of the table as a S.E.P.H.I.R.O.T.H appears and both soon end up fighting as men in lab coats rush in trying to break up the fight)_

_The Doctor:_ Uh _(talking to someone off screen)_ did that just happen while we were filming?

_(Voice: Yeah it did...)_

_The Doctor:_ I thought you said you were going to leave him with A.X.E.L?

_(Voice: I tried, A.X.E.L left him to go bother S.O.R.A and R.O.X.A.S)_

_The Doctor:_ I thought I told you to put him with A.N.G.E.A.L and G.E.N.E.S.I.S?

_(Voice: Uh yeah about that.)_

_(C.L.O.U.D huffs out of annoyance hitting the Doctor and points at the camera)_

_The Doctor:_ Uh...oh right...I must warn you that they will fight with the villains. So we do encourage you to not try and get a villain and a hero though you can get them if you wish...just prepare for madness.

Uh...what else what else...I think that's about everything. Oh yeah, don't worry about their price the first one is always free, however these little guys and girls will run you a fair price of $300 dollars, which includes warranty on their weapons.

_(S.E.P.H.I.R.O.T.H yawns sitting down with his legs crossed and eyes closed as C.L.O.U.D makes his way to the other end of the table)_

_The Doctor:_ Okay that's everything, you'll now be sent to a screen with you options of how to adopt our robots, that's for watching.

_Restart Video?_

_**Random Adoption?** _

_**Match Me Adoption?** _

_**Lemme Call the Shots Adoption?** _


	2. NOCTIS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For those who ended up with or picked Noctis your package has arrived.

You receive a large box with holes in it labeled with letters reading 'FRAGILE' and 'THIS SIDE UP''.

You set it down and open the box only to find the inside lined with blankets and pillows and your character swaddled in a black blanket laying on its belly.

Next to it is a booklet, taking it out it reads;

**Thank You for your purchase of N.O.C.T.I.S L.U.C.I.S C.A.E.L.U.M**

It gives you a brief description of Noctis but you don't read it you already know his story.

You gently lift the prince up, noticing that the robot is fairly heavy and feels soft almost life like. You notice a small heartbeat and the small rise and fall of Noctis' chest as well. It was sort of creepy but interesting to feel the tiny prince sleeping in your hands. You either lay him back in the box or set him in your lap _._

_**Instructions:** _

_**How to activate N.O.C.T.I.S-** _ _As you may have already experienced you may have noticed that N.O.C.T.I.S has a heartbeat and is breathing. That just means he's alive, but he isn't on. To turn on N.O.C.T.I.S you must place him on something comfortable and warm. Our customers recommend a bed with tons of blankets wrapped around him._

_Leave your N.O.C.T.I.S alone for about fifteen minutes (the length of a nap), however we had gotten reports of him taking longer. Please be patient._

_Once awake you may find him simply laying there staring, don't worry it's perfectly normal, we do advise you to feed him once he's awake._

_**Food:** _

_N.O.C.T.I.S isn't overly picky his meals as long as they taste good and_ _**DO NOT** _ _contain vegetables (this includes beans it's a common mistake). However to keep your N.O.C.T.I.S healthy we do advise giving him vegetables but you must make them taste good._

_**What to Expect:** _

_Once N.O.C.T.I.S had become accustomed to your home he will begin feet much more relaxed and less tense. This will result in him sleeping wherever he is currently sitting or sleeping in the space designated for him. If you have comics, manga, or fishing magazines he will get into them and read them._

_N.O.C.T.I.S will often explore the outside and collect items which he will give you. N.O.C.T.I.S will also venture outside to hangout with the models of his friends if they are nearby or request to see them if he knows that a family member or friend has one of his friends._

_N.O.C.T.I.S will also feed and play with stray animals or any pets you have at home. He will also often ask if he could go fishing but be prepared to be out side all day._

_**Do's and Don't:** _

_**Do:** _ _The prince is lazy, we advise you to take him on walks and or have him train_

_**Don't:** _ _Don't force N.O.C.T.I.S. into training he won't listen and will become frustrated._

_**Do:** _ _When driving N.O.C.T.I.S will want to hang out the window, we advise some kind of contraption to let him hang onto. We aren't sure why but it relaxes him so let him go ahead._

_**Don't:** _ _Its best to not tell him to climb down he'll only end up angry._

You set down the booklet and scoop up the prince heading to your room placing him in your bed trying to figure out how he could possibly tell the difference between a pile of blankets and a mattress. After covering him up you head back into the living room to rummage through the box. You take out the blankets and pillows and find several potions and a Phoenix Down and several outfits that Noctis wears in the game including the special outfits like the Chocobo Moogle tee, Kings Garb, and the Mariachi outfit.

You pick up the booklet and glance through it picking up on little information that you already knew about the prince but read it anyway.

_**EXTRA:** _

_N.O.C.T.I.S may not look it but he has a tendency to complain and cry. When he complains it's best to reason with him and not argue. It's not often but N.O.C.T.I.S will cry, those who owned N.O.C.T.I.S says they found their prince in tears whenever a pet or loved one died or if he had been stressed out for a long time. Some say it's best to leave him alone others say it's best to sit with him. It's up to you and how you feel comfortable dealing with him, N.O.C.T.I.S. will not hate you for whatever you choose._

_We must also inform you that you must earn the right to call him N.O.C.T he will not respond if you call him by his nickname. He will come to you and tell you to call him by his nickname once he feels a bond, in which he will give you a nickname._

You close the booklet tossing it into the box.

Fifteen minutes pass and you enter your room only to find the sleepy prince staring at the wall, N.O.C.T.I.S notices you and simply says "Morning."


	3. I.G.N.I.S.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for purchasing IGNIS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry Iggy, I couldn't resist!

On your doorstep you find a fairly large blue police telephone booth with a light on top. It takes some effort but you manage to bring it indoors.

You open the doors questioning of this is the right order. You did select Final Fantasy right? 

Inside bundled up was indeed your I.G.N.I.S. 

Next to it is a booklet, taking it out it reads;

**Thank You for your purchase of I.G.N.I.S S.T.U.P.E.O S.C.I.E.N.T.I.A**

It gives you a brief description of Ignis but you don't read it you already know his story.

You gently lift the tactician up, noticing that the robot is fairly heavy and feels soft almost life like. You notice the small heartbeat and the small rise and fall of Ignis' chest as well. It was sort of creepy but interesting to feel the tiny advisor sleeping in your hands. You either lay him back in the time machine or set him in your lap.

**Instructions:**

_How to activate I.G.N.I.S- As you may have already experienced you may have noticed that I.G.N.I.S has a heartbeat and is breathing. That just means he's alive, but he isn't on. To turn on I.G.N.I.S you must place him in a filthy room, a small workspace, or in the kitchen. Many prefer the kitchen and workspace but the choice is yours._

_Leave your I.G.N.I.S alone for the rest of the night. Note: This model consumes greats amount of 'energy' for the work he does. First time boots require extra time._

_Once awake you may find that he had cleaned the space you left him if he was in a dirty room, did any paperwork for you that you say him by, or made you the corresponding meal at the hour he woke up._

**Food:**

_I.G.N.I.S isn't at all a picky eater, he will be thankful for whatever it is you make him. Mostly because he was given a break. We do advise however that you make his favorite meal if you notice that he is having a rough day._

_It's not food exactly but it is a consumable, Ebony. The other form of energy for I.G.N.I.S. We have given you a voucher for a lifetime supply for free of the can coffee and you can cancel any time._

**WARNING: DO NOT TAKE ONE FOR YOURSELF. WE HAVE GOTTEN MUCH FEEDBACK FROM CONSUMERS THAT I.G.N.I.S WILL THROW A TANTRUM OR QUESTION YOU IF HE LEARNS YOU TOOK ONE OF THE CANS OF EBONY. WE ALL SEEN THE CUTE VIDEOS OF PETS CREEPING UP ON THEIR OWNERS. IT'S SCARY WHEN A LITTLE ROBOT WITH DAGGERS DOES IT.**

**What to Expect:**

_Once I.G.N.I.S has become accustomed to your routine he will start helping you out around the house. He will begin to clean up and make meals for you._

_However because he does this you may find him napping in random spots that he finds comfortable. If you find him asleep someplace don't hesitate to hold him. Studies have shown it makes him bond faster with you._

_I.G.N.I.S will leave your home if there is a N.O.C.T.I.S nearby. He may even leave occasionally if his friends are close by. But don't worry I.G.N.I.S will return before you can start to worry or get home._

**Do's and Don't:**

_Do: Assist if possible and where you can_

_Don't: Overwork I.G.N.I.S, he will become sick_

_Do: Let him visit N.O.C.T.I.S he will constantly worry over the prince. Note: We advise buying N.O.C.T.I.S. We also offer a free prince with the proof of purchase R.E.G.I.S, I.G.N.I.S, G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S, P.R.O.M.P.T.O, L.U.N.A, I.R.I.S, and [Redacted]. See back of booklet on how to get a N.O.C.T.I.S._

_Don't: Tell him not to worry_

You set down the booklet and scoop up the advisor heading to your kitchen placing him on your counter trying to figure out how he could possibly tell the difference between all the different places.

You pile a few blankets onto the counter and place him down. After covering him up you head back into the living room to rummage through the phone booth. You take out the blankets and pillows and find several potions and a Phoenix Down and several outfits that Ignis wears in the game. You also find his black notebook.

You pick up the booklet and glance through it picking up on little information that you already knew about the advisor but read it anyway.

**EXTRA:**

**WARNING: THIS IS NOT A BUTLER ROBOT!!! TREATING HIM AS SUCH WILL RESULT IN A SYSTEM FAILURE. HE WILL BECOME GRAVELY ILL AND WILL DIE IF LEFT UNTREATED. IF YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW TRIGGERS THIS PLEASE CONTACT THE EMERGENCY NUMBER ON THE BACK OF THIS BOOKLET.**

_I.G.N.I.S will never admit that he is feeling down or express any other emotion unless he trusts you. When he opens up he may end letting out all sorts of baggage that he's kept bottled up. He may end up sad or trying not to cry, comfort him how you see fit. He will apologize for taking up your time no matter what you do._

_If you leave him alone with access to music you may catch him singing._

_I.G.N.I.S will ask you if you need help with anything or ask your preference for dinner, it's best to give him a wagon so he can go shopping for you. Or you can take him with you where he'll teach you how to find the best ingredients in the saddest of stores. Of course he'll show you how to haggle for the best prices at checkout._

_I.G.N.I.S_ _is prone to common sickness (like the other models are, but he tends to get sick more often) do to his constant working. Make sure your I.G.N.I.S gets plenty rest. Common cold/flu treatment will get him better._

_However if you continue to make him work and do strenuous work without rest I.G.N.I.S will enter SYSTEM FAILURE. He will die. Note: The Phoenix Down will not revive him._

_Finally I.G.N.I.S is programmed with human flaws. If he drops something, breaks something, or does something wrong don't scold him. Remember he isn't a robot butler, if you need flawless we sell ones more suited for this task. Scolding I.G.N.I.S will only result in him getting upset._

_Please enjoy your new companion and thank you for shopping Square'd Enix._

You close the booklet tossing it into the booth.

The next morning you enter your kitchen only to find the advisor walking across the counter carrying two eggs in his arms. He notices you and nods "Morning." I.G.N.I.S says.


	4. G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your order of Gladiolus

You receive a large green Coleman tent already pitched on your doorstep.

You frown realizing that it was going to be nearly impossible to get this inside without dismantling it. So you step outside.

Peeking into the tent you see a fairly large figure in a sleeping bag.

Next to it is a booklet, carefully and quietly reaching into the tent after unzipping it you take out the booklet and read it.

**Thank You for your purchase of G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S A.M.A.C.I.T.I.A**

It gives you a brief description of Gladio but you don't read it you already know about the Kings' Shield.

You reach into to the tent and gently pull the Shield out of his sleeping bag, you notice that the robot is heavy, like you're holding three bricks in one hand. He doesn't feel too soft but he still feels life like. You notice a small heartbeat and the small rise and fall of Gladios' chest as well. But what caught your attention was his muscles and washboard abs. It was sort of creepy the detail of this little guy but it was interesting to feel the Kings' Shield sleeping in your hands. You can either lay him back in the box or set him in your lap _._

_**Instructions:** _

_**How to activate G.L.A.D.I.O-** _ _As you may have already experienced you may have noticed that G.L.A.D.I.O has a heartbeat and is breathing. That just means he's alive, but he isn't on. To turn on G.L.A.D.I.O you must place him outside inside the tent he came with along side a large cup of Cup Noddle (which we have provided for you)._

_Leave your G.L.A.D.I.O inside the tent overnight, and if you wish you could spend the night in the tent as well. Please be patient._

_Once awake you may find him exercising such as doing laps around the house or push-ups etc. We suggest making him some breakfast._

_**Food:** _

_G.L.A.D.I.O has a tendency to be picky with his meals but as long as they taste good and_ _**DO** _ _contain meat, he will be fine. However to keep your G.L.A.D.I.O_ _healthy we do advise giving him vegetables. Note: The vegetables in the Cup Noodle_ **DO NOT** _count as vegetables._

**WARNING: YOUR G.L.A.D.I.O WILL DO ANYTHING FOR CUP NOODLES IT IS ADVISED THAT YOU KEEP AT LEAST A SMALL BOX OF IT IN YOUR HOME. WE HAVE ALSO PROVIDED YOU WITH A VOUCHER FOR A LIFE TIME SUPPLY OF CUP NOODLE.**

_**What to Expect:** _

_Once G.L.A.D.I.O has become accustomed to your home he may often ask if he could sleep in the tent. It's nothing against you but he just really loves camping._

_G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S is a protective brother and will often leave if he feels that his sister is in trouble, if an I.R.I.S model is nearby._

_Being the king-to-be's Shield he will often go the prince, if close by. He will also go to hang out with his friends and may not return for a few days but it's only because he's camping._

_He will always return._

 

_**Do's and Don't:** _

_**Do:** _ _Let him protect you. Dispite his small size G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S is very strong._

_**Don't:**   Deny him Cup Noodle_

_**Do:** Take him camping_

_**Don't:** Deny him access to his sister. Note: To prevent this we advise purchasing I.R.I.S. We may also send the model to you free of charge with proof of you owning G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S._

You set down the booklet down and put the small robot back inside the sleeping. You begin to pull the tent into your backyard as you try to figure out how he could tell the difference from the porch and yard. After the small change of scenery you to rummage through the tent. You find blankets and pillows and find several potions, of course Coleman gear, and a Phoenix Down. Along with several outfits that Gladiolus wore in the game.

You pick up the booklet back up and glance through it picking up on little information that you already knew about the massive man/robot but read it anyway.

_**EXTRA:** _

 

_Despite being a piece of technology G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S isn't very tech savvy. He may know how to use a phone, access the internet, and how to use a videogame system. But don't expect him to know how to big tech stuff like Photoshop. He's a 'Low Tech kind of bot/guy'._

_Despite being a foot tall G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S can lift and carry with great easy thirty times his weight. So don't be worried with giving him 'heavy' items._

_G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S may begin going without a shirt. It's normal and another outfit for him called Rugged._

_If G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S trusts you he will ask you to come camping and request you do it often._

You close the booklet tossing it into the tent.

Seeing that it was late you go inside the tent. 

You're awoken to blinding sunlight spilling in from the mesh window. You hear the tent open and G.L.A.D.I.O.L.U.S steps inside "Sup."

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I'm the doctors assistant. I'm one of many staff members who will be answering any questions you have about your new additions to your home. We are currently shipping out your order as you read this, please allow at least a day or two for your item to arrive.
> 
> Thank you for purchasing from Square² Enix


End file.
